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Its so common in schools to have the "just say no!" line drilled into you, but its always to do with drugs or assault or generally bad things.

What if the thing you should say no to is a GOOD thing?


I have a terrible time saying no, and standing my ground on the fact. I feel if I can do something for someone, then I probably should. Unfortunately this is usually detrimental to my health and the people around me who are left to pick up the pieces.

You would think by now I would have learned that I can't force things, but no, I try anyway *sigh*


Anyway, i'm wondering if i'm alone.

Can you say no?



For animals, the entire universe has been neatly divided into things to (a) mate with, (b) eat, (c) run away from, and (d) rocks. - Terry Pratchett

Instead of just saying no, I just tell the person that I have other plans. But you have to be a pretty good liar to pull it off, otherwise they'll start to suspect...

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I'm not your neighbor, you Bakersfield trash.

You have to prioritize, and in your condition and background, you have to come first.

Learning to just say no "because I don't want to" with no excuses and without lying is one of the hardest things I ever learned to do.

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I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.
~ Mae West

I struggle with saying no to things. I hate feeling like I'm letting someone down. Then, when I get in the middle of whatever it was I said yes to (when I should have said no) I regret it and hate every minute of it.

Something I def. need to work on

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~~Melissa~~
"Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder."

I think it is a mater of age and experience and you learn as you go along the road of life.

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Keith

Near enough is not good enough, therefore good enough is not near enough, and only your best will do.
I VOTE DO YOU if not WHY NOT?
VOTE NOW VOTE NOW

i just say no, people might think different of me but aye who cares what they think.

I get better at no as I get older and realize that life is too short to spend it doing so much crap for other people.

It's still hard for me though....

I'm getting better!

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~~Melissa~~
"Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder."

I answered "yes".... but that's cause I can't say NO.... ! darn got me a good one.

I have strategies that sometimes work but I do get caught out. Once I say yes though it is a YES - often to the detriment of my health.

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~~~ My fish blow kisses at me all day long ~~~

no


"A noble spirit embiggens the smallest man" Simpsons

I can say NO to things but I feel REALLY guilty about it.



As far as favors are concerned that is. I don't really feel guilty to saying NO to manual labor unless the person asking is just incapable of taking care of it. When said person is in better shape than I am, then I don't really have so much of a second thought.

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"it's the neck, it creaks under the weight of too much heavy thinking."

I say no to a whole lot of things, but unfortunately whenever a certain mission in life is huge, likely to have dire consequences and be difficult , stressful , and expensive thats when I have trouble saying no. It has become worse now that im older too.

If someones suicidal, especially aggressive or drug addled, an animal needs rescuing,or saved from abuse, a political, moral, or religious situation is ridiculous, the environment corrupted etc, the pillock actually trying to do something about it is me.The ironic thing is im not in particularly great control over my own life, and I often let things slip into chaos and rather like yourself.

Its one of those things, in certain situations, there has to be somebody that does something to right things, and its not that we have messiah complexes or hero urges or delusions of grandeur , its actually that the consequeces of living with the guilt of not doing more is far, far, worse than the pain and burden that comes from helping. When you have the kind of mind that relives your failures a hundred times over in a day, you find yourself inexorably driven to help and give the big Yes.

I have the feeling that if more people were like-minded the world might be a better place.