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Inkling
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EditedEdited by Inkling
Hm. I have been writing alot lately, and a lot of it is, shall I say, not what I usually write. Unfortunatly in my college class, Juvinial Sci-Fi/Fantsy doesn't go over very well.

Anyway, I started to write a story (3 parts) and Im already through the second part. Basically, a young woman (19 or 20) goes home to her lonely apartment and is talking to her cat (she is very close with her cat) and all of a sudden a man with a knife comes up behind her. I really wish I could have ended it there, but everyone in my class wants to know what happens next. For the second part, she is just kind of hiding in the pantry, which is very boring. Any ideas as to how I could (tastefully) end this without being to cliche'? I'd prefer if she survived....

Normally, Im really good at this stuff, Im just have a bit of writers block, so any small ideas as to what I could do, would really help.

Thanks a bunch

PS I'd like to clarify: Im not asking you to do my homework for me, Im asking only for some ideas to help me get started.

Inky
Post InfoPosted 28-Feb-2006 21:39Profile Homepage AIM PM Edit Report 
crazyred
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Perhaps you could have the cat, in a fit of kitty rage, pounce on the bad guy and claw the crap out of him thereby affording the young woman the opportunity to escape. Oooh he could even lose an eye in the ensuing scuffle, that'd be cool.

It's been know to happen, even with cats, and you could give him a nasty case of "cat scratch fever" from the wounds as he rots in jail....muwahahahaha.


~~Melissa~~
"Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder."
Post InfoPosted 28-Feb-2006 22:34Profile MSN PM Edit Delete Report 
Inkling
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I agree that the cat has alot of potential... thanks!

Inky
Post InfoPosted 01-Mar-2006 01:09Profile Homepage AIM PM Edit Delete Report 
Shinigami
 
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EditedEdited by Metagon
What's the man's story? What is his reason to be there? Talking about his side could make the story more complex, but also more interesting. The third part of the story will be, probably, how the two people come to terms with this conflict. The man could be defeated and sent to jail, or he might actually win over the woman. Maybe he traps her in a corner, threatens her life, and does this all just to prove a point, rather than actually wanting to kill her. Maybe she just finally ends the fear when hiding by coming out and facing her fear; she could attack him or try to actually talk to the man and reason with him.

Or maybe she could jump out, try to reason with him, and if he doesn't actually think what she says is reasonable, the cat could jump out of nowhere and attack him. For the most effectiveness, you should try to make it so that the reader or listener forgets the cat is there for a while, so the surprise is even more random and hysterical.

It sounds interesting, and you've got plenty of directions to go still.

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Post InfoPosted 01-Mar-2006 01:13Profile PM Edit Delete Report 
just beginning
 
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Is there an underlying message or meaning to the story, or is it just a bunch of stuff that happens? Stories that are just plot and action can be fun to read, but as it is for a college class, you might want to consider some additional depth. Why should this story be told? Why will your readers care about your protagonist and what happens to her? Is her attacker a cardboard cut-out villian, or is he more three-dimensional - will your readers be able to identify with him in any way?


The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it. - Oscar Wilde
Post InfoPosted 01-Mar-2006 02:07Profile Homepage PM Edit Delete Report 
Inkling
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I tried to make him with a little more debth. At first, he seems to be a cardboard cut out, but in the second scene I gave him the name of Smith. He also knows were she's hiding and is kind of toying with her a bit, I did notice he talks down to her quite a bit, but the way he talks is more "now, honey, come out of your room." rather then "GET OUT OF THERE...grrrr...." I think that this shows his personality a little bit and he is turning into a creepy yet fun charictor to portray.

Also, I'm lovin the idea of the cat attack.

There is no real "moral to the story", but I dare say that mine is rather good (some were better) but I also read some in the class that were downright terrible (i.e. every other word was one that started with "f" and one that I couldn't even understand. I will try adding more debth, and hopefully I'll get somewhere.

Inky
Post InfoPosted 01-Mar-2006 02:43Profile Homepage AIM PM Edit Delete Report 
longhairedgit
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EditedEdited by longhairedgit
The cat attacking the guy is funny, but too B movie, its also kinda predictable in a disney way. If youre gonna do B movie, do it properly like this...

You could be really gross and have him stab the cat, he holds it in her face and the horror starts from there, he allows her to run for a little while, giggling to himself..... she starts screaming uncontrollably, backing out of the room sending stuff falling off tables crashing to the floor etc.

Hes feeling all smug and powerful and she runs back in and hits him in the face with a copper bottomed frying pan, he grabs her partially unconscious and they fall out through the doorway down a flight of stairs , straight into the street where some cops are giving some guy hassle about parking in front of a hydrant. They see her still beating him about the head with a frying pan and they grab her. As soon as he rises to his feet he pushes all three of them over and runs off, and shes left explaining herself while the second cop calls for backup...

That way hes so infuriated with the dent to his ego that he feels absolutely compelled to come back 10 times more psychotic, and she gets a huge emotional excuse for having been enraged enough to fight her way to the next round.

Imagine it cinematically - imagine the audiences shock when the cat gets nailed , and their rather wicked laughs and sense of renewed justice as she comes in to smash him in the face with the pan instead of running away. All that and they get to have a rematch later with the suspense of a delay in between plus he might try to get at her while shes in custody , he might be a lawyer etc, or have found some other diabolical and equally smooth way to get into the police building. Maybe he might prove his escalating psychosis by killing a cop or two..

..and if the audience swallow that, theyll swallow anything.

It'll work, you know it.. It might take robert rodrigues to direct it, but it would work You can always have a stunt cat covered in bandages at the end, as tibbles makes a miracle recovery from his stabwound.In keeping with an a grade B movie, you have to give them something different to begin with, and then totally sell out at the end.

Yes I know, I forgot to take the pills again

(no animals were harmed in the making of this movie)lol.
Post InfoPosted 01-Mar-2006 07:16Profile MSN PM Edit Delete Report 
crazyred
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Well, now that cat attack isn't exactly "B" movie, more like an interesting episode of "Amazing Animal" stories where a pet comes to their owner's rescue.

Course I guess you could also go this route.....while the lady is hiding and the meanie is rummaging through her things he realizes that she is actually someone he is kin too (cousin, Aunt, whatever) and in the interest of family, he dcides not to rob, rape and kill her.

They form a family bond that is everlasting and he gets help for his violence issues.

Nah....have the cat kill him!


~~Melissa~~
"Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder."
Post InfoPosted 01-Mar-2006 17:04Profile MSN PM Edit Delete Report 
Inkling
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EditedEdited by Inkling
I added a charictor, Mr.Egg. The story goes like this so far:

the lady (Alice) gets out of her car on a fine spring day and has a lovely conversation with mr.egg (the creepy neighbor, little older and very friendly, but still creepy) about the local news and how crime is spiking in her area. She says goodbye and goes inside. Whiskers the cat greets her and she goes into the kitchen to feed him. After she poors his food in a bowl, he starts to freak out and thats when she relises that a guy is behind her.

They have a brief fight, which ends with her being cut on the arm (not too badly) and running in the pantry. She finds a little peep hole and watches everything thats going on from here on out. The guy knows shes in there and is trying to get her to come out. He asks nicely since he cant get in. He goes into the other room (He'll know if she gets out) and while hes in there she tries to send a note next door to Mr.Egg through Whiskers (not that it would work). The scene ends when Mr.Egg comes into her apartment and talks with the killer, asking where she is (He knows the killer) and the scene ends with him being killed (Didn't get detailed at all, basically it was written like this "I saw the knife come up behind him, and I screamed, and turned away)

I still have one more scene to write though. I'm thinking of having the cat save the day, but I'm not sure if it would turn out to be too Lassie? This is turning out so grimmly....

Inky
Post InfoPosted 02-Mar-2006 01:44Profile Homepage AIM PM Edit Delete Report 
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