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I really wish I didn't have to talk with the general public at the pet store where I work. Yeah, it's inevitable that I have to help dumb people and answer questions which only need common sense. That's part of the job. But some people must have been drop kicked in the head as children. I got a phone call today about a snake which had been acting lethargic. Guy said he didn't have a heat lamp for it, so he put it in the microwave. Yes, the microwave. I thought it was a prank call, so I told him it was a bad move and hung up. The same person came in later and asked me about the snake again. It turns out he thought he could make up for a heat lamp by putting his poor snake in the micro for two minutes! He told me that it had started twitching afterwards. I let him know (nicely) that his snake was going to die, and that a replacement would cost more than a lamp and bulb would have. Next thing he wants to know is if thirty seconds would have been better.

Why are people like this around? Sometimes I wish that natural selection was harsher to humans. Maybe people wouldn't suck so much.

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And when he gets to Heaven, to Saint Peter he will tell: "One more Marine reporting, Sir! I've served my time in Hell."

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Wow.

I thought the lady with the half-gallon critter keeper who wanted a pleco to clean up after the two goldfish she had in there was bad.

Retail sucks. I remember those days. I hope I never have to do that again. But then again, I did get a little bit of joy from making the store look nice and the approximately one in 50 customers who actually listened to me instead of assuming that because I was young I knew absolutely nothing about what I was telling them.

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Well 30 seconds would have been better than 2 minutes, probably.

Unfortunately we don't HAVE to talk to the competent people, They know what they are doing and don't generally need help. When they do it's brief. That IMO is why it seems so lopsided. I'm hoping I don't get ransacked with idiots tomorrow as well. I feel ya Senator. Gotta shake those off.

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Critical Fertilator: The Micromanager of Macronutrients

Uggg Yuck !
Sooooo sorry sirbooks ! that's the number one reason I could never work in a LFS that sold fish....maybe in one that just did drygoods...but I think that'd have almost the same issues.

That poor snake, I wonder if he can be arrested on animal cruelty charges....oh wait...a snake isn't "cute and cuddely" so no one will care, but I bet if someone did that to anything with fur (minues spiders) they'd get a fine .

^_^

I feel ya Senator

I laughed my butt off for about 15 minutes when I read that^^^^^^^^^.

Retail does suck. I worked it for years....never again, people in general are stupid.

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~~Melissa~~
"Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder."

So the snake was actually still alive after two minutes in the microwave? That must be one indestructible snake... I know a cup of water will start to boil after about two minutes in the microwave.

Do me a favor, please. Tell that guy he's an idiot and should never be trusted with the care of another living organism for as long as he shall live.

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I'm not your neighbor, you Bakersfield trash.

The really sad thing is that he's a buddy of this guy Nick who also works there. Some days I just have a strong urge to sock someone in the gut. Like when customers I don't know call me "Slim". But that's nothing compared to putting a snake in the microwave. Geez.

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And when he gets to Heaven, to Saint Peter he will tell: "One more Marine reporting, Sir! I've served my time in Hell."

Over the years I have worked in retail hardware stores and demonstrating power tools also in the furniture stores. I can assure you it is the same there especially with power tools they want the cheapest to do a big job then come then they come next week complaining the machine blew up and complain like ^*^%%((^% and it all you fault.

Have a look in [link=My Profile] http://www.fishprofiles.com/forums/member.aspx?id=1935[/link] for my tank info

Look here for my
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Keith

Near enough is not good enough, therefore good enough is not near enough, and only your best will do.
I VOTE DO YOU if not WHY NOT?
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ahh retail.

I feel your pain.

Sirbooks I think I am going to cry. That is not okay that he owns pets and does that. He should be banned from purchasing reptiles since he does not understand how to care for them.

When selling animals/fish all staff should ask questions to find out if the purchaser is educated enough to care for their new friend.
Here is a fish example.....
Do you have a heater in your fishtank?
No.
Well, these are warm water fish and unless you buy a heater with your fish purchase I will not sell them to you because they will die.

At my lfs they ask me questions that show they think I don't know what I am doing. Eg asking about my substrate or cichlid tank decor/hiding places. I am glad they do it because it means they are asking it of people who want to buy fish without knowing they need a heater or certain pH or whatever. So thank goodness they ask.

Please tell me that he did not microwave a live creature... I really am going to cry.

He should be reported for cruelty to animals! I am serious. If he gets a fine then he will learn. I am distressed and disgusted. I think you did well to refrain from taking a swing.

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~~~ My fish blow kisses at me all day long ~~~

He should be reported for cruelty to animals! I am serious.

Like Babel said, the ASPCA won't do crap about it because snakes are furry or cuddly. Even PETA doesn't care about any of the ectothermic animals... All the PETA members I've met are all scared of snakes and bugs, or just dislike them for no reason. In my experience, vegans tend to be some of the most hypocritical people you'll ever meet... Claiming to save some groups of animals while completely hating others.

Anyway, that's my rant about people who don't think that cold-blooded pets should be treated as well as our cats and dogs (and vegans, too).

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I'm not your neighbor, you Bakersfield trash.

Didn't something akin to this happen in Snakes On A Plane?

In any case, just how many IQ points below baseline do you have to be to warm a snake in a microwave? That is the most ridiculous pet mishap I think I've ever heard.

Two minutes in a microwave would kill a snake. Water begins to boil after that long.

Which means this gent must've set the microwave to "Low" before putting his snake in.

Which of course begs the question: How is it that a person with the cognitive abilities to change a microwave from "High" to "Low" still could not figure out that putting a snake in a microwave oven was a bad idea to begin with?

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Back in the saddle!

It depends on how big the snake is. If it was a particularly big one, it wouldn't have died as fast. Kind of like if you put a cup of water in the microwave, it'll boil in a couple minutes, but if you put a big bowl of water in, it'll take maybe 10-15 minutes.

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i'm not as smart as alot of people when it come to fish. but i do know enough.. but my favorite past time is walkting threw the local shops and chains and listening to the people asking the workers stupid questions. and then I laugh.

last week, i was in a shop, kid bought 2 6 inch oscars for his 55g, then was about to buy a school of neons, zebras, some angels and some swords... all i could do was laugh and tell the guy i was with, that the kid is just buying expensive feeder fish... luckily for everybody. the guy he was talking to was smart enough to tell the kid that, this would not work

Fish tanks are an expensive addiction

What a numbnut. Absolutely appaling.
You handled it very calmly Nick. I'm afraid I probably would not of done so well.

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Before you criticize someone walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

Some stuff I've heard from working retail...

"My cichlids were fighting so I poked one with a fork to teach him. One time I poked him in the eye, now it fell out and I call him one eye willy."

"His top fin would hurt me every time I cleaned the tank so I took him out one day and took my exacto knife and cut it off."

"He kept chasing the other fish so I pulled him out and let him dry out on the driveway."

"I want that one, those, that one, that one, and that one"
Fish he picked out:
Clownfish (yes, SW)
Neon Tetras
Red Devil
Discus
Angelfish

"My oscar lived for months in a 10 gallon! That's a long time for a fish!"

"You need a heater?"
"You need to clean the tank?"
"I never change water."

And this is just relevant stuff. I could go on and on about just plain STUPID stuff that I've heard. We were kinda close to a mentally disabled center, so we would get a lot of nurses with a patient come in just to look around and give them fresh air. I've heard them ask things that made "normal" people look dumber than a empty box.

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"What do you mean I have to bring in the dead fish! I flushed it!"
Sir, this is a $25 fish you are claiming dead, but do not have proof.
"Why do I need to bring the fish in? It died, I flushed it, I want my money back"

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"I only bought this two months ago!"
Sir, you will have to contact the manufacturer, we only offer a two week, warranty, then manufacturer's warranty rules, and we have this print directly on your receipt.
"You have to be kidding me!"

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this story is referring to a light system with 2 halides and 4 PC lights. This is the VERY shorten version, you can imagine enough from this. Also, when thinking of this lady, this of the most annoying voice you've ever heard, and put that on the RUDDEST person on earth
"My light is broken"
-What exactly is wrong?
"Its broke!"
-Does it not turn on at all? Do the halides work, but not the PCs, vice-versa?
"Its just broken"
-Ma'am, you will have to bring it in for us to find the problem.
she brings in the unit and it turns out that a built in ballast for the halide needs replaced
-Ma'am, the ballast is shot, we can order one in for you, but it will take a while.
"Well, I need it today, my corals will die without it."
-We do not carry this part nor this brand stock. None of our distributors carry this stock. We will have to get a special order from a company in SF.
"Well, I'll go look around at other stores, maybe they will be more willing to help me"
few hours later she comes back
"How much will it cost me to get it in"
we get all the details set, it will take three weeks to get it. turns out, the company we were getting it from actually found one in stock and could get it to us a week early, however, about a day or two before it comes in...
"WHERE IS MY PART!!!"
-We told you that it would take three weeks to get in, but in fact, we are getting it about a week early.
"WELL I NEED IT NOW, WHERE IS IT!?!?"
-We do not have it right now, it should be in a truck to us at this moment.
"I want my money back! Just cancel the order, send it back, give me my money back"
-Ma'am, this is a specially ordered part just for you, we collect money so we could order it and get it to you. We cannot simply send it back.
"I don't care, give me my money back NOW!"
we talk to the company and tell them the situation and and it turns out that we worked out a deal that allowed us to send it back. But about a week and a half later...
"WHERE IS MY PART"
-You told us to send it back. You got your money back. The whole deal was undone.
"BUT I STILL NEED IT! THIS IS RIDUCULOUS! HOW CAN YOU TREAT ME LIKE THIS. I GAVE YOU MONEY, I GAVE YOU BUSINESS, AND THIS IS WHAT YOU DO TO ME."
in the end, we lost money (the cost to UPS the ballast back to SF)

Hahaha... All that is very familiar to me. Especially the guy asking for his money back for a fish he flushed down the toilet.

Also, there was this woman who I think had mental issues, because she would come in and start talking to the tarantulas and scorpions for like an hour (sometimes more, until we closed for the day). She claimed to have a show on Animal Planet as well, and she was looking for new animals to feature on her show. She bought a milksnake from another store one time, and she was holding it while she was driving home, but it crawled away and she never saw it again. And apprently, all of her pets are best friends and always play with each other (even her other snake, her mouse, her parakeet, and her cat)...

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I'm not your neighbor, you Bakersfield trash.

Here's one I heard today:

"I only have one fish left. I just don't inderstand. The guy at W****** said 10 goldfish would be fine in a 2g bowl."



I don't care if you otherwise don't know jack you-know-what about fish. Knowing that just won't work is COMMON SENSE

Goldfish are probably the most abused fish in the hobby. I have about two dozen stories about dumb customers and their refusal to acknowledge that goldfish need more than half a cup of water live in.

One time, a woman and her daughter came in with a small, horribly sick goldfish they had been keeping in a shot glass (yes, I'm totally serious) for a couple weeks. They asked me what they could do to make it better, and when I carefully explained that goldfish need a real, filtered tank in order to survive, they just became angry and frustrated and said it wasn't true. Then they just left the store with their shot glass. I'm willing to bet the fish died later that day.

And also, I hate when people would get angry and not understand why I refused to sell goldfish for bowls, but I was perfectly fine with selling them as feeders.
"But living in my bowl is nicer to the fish than getting fed to another fish!"
Ummm... No.

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I'm not your neighbor, you Bakersfield trash.