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Have ya all seen on the news & on Oprah about those purple bands? Apparently some pastor got his congregation to wear them. (the ones that volunteered)

The idea is to learn not to be critical. You put the band on a certain wrist & see if you can keep it on that wrist for 21 days straight. As soon as you say something critical, you take the band off & put it on the other wrist & start counting your 21 days all over again! They say it takes 21 days to form a new habit. The pastor said it was hard but he did it.

Oprah did not take the challenge, but she gave one to her make-up artist & he accepted it. I thought it would be interesting as well as fun to try, but hubby already admitted he wouldn't last 5 minutes. I agree, so there's no fun there. Opps! Am I being critical?
That's the thing........ the fine line between being critical, or just stating something. I think it would be hard to judge. But still......... it would have to make a better person out of you, just for the trying.

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I cant imagine the point in wearing one!

Being critical is there for a reason, its stops people smelling like tramps, and wearing really , really stupid clothes etc. Its most useful function is stemming tides of stupidity and massively abnormal levels of mental self indulgence.

Whatever will they think of next? Answer: whatever shortcut people use to avoid thinking as and when it fashionably suits them.

Its funny and its stupid, but god help people who take it seriously!

So am I critical? Of course, im also angry, demented ,sad, happy , lovely, sarcastic, and a million other emotions states and feelings, and I never felt the urge to wear a band for any particular state or keep it up for 21 days. If I had a band for every thought in my brain id look like a badly wrapped egyptian mummy!

I swear humans get stupider every year. Now thats a critique

You speak the truth, LHG.

Joe Potato

WELL! This subject could open up a can of worms!

Since I'm not as eloquent a speaker as you git, I will refrain from any attempt to try & discuss this subject, as I'm sure I would come out on the short end!

But I Will say this, "I still wanna play the game!"

"Its funny and its stupid, but god help people who take it seriously!"

God help fish patty!

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LOL Argue away, I love dissent, it keeps me strong! Hey, if youre a true believer, fight for your corner and give me hell!

Arguing is one of lifes finer priviledges.

I WILL grant you this git........maybe "critical" is not the best word that pastor could have used. I've been trying to think of a better one, but since words are not my speciality, the "perfect" word I'm looking for escapes me.

And maybe it's not "one" word I'm looking for, but many different words, that put together that will get the idea across of what this pastor is trying to achieve.

I agree with you that there is a place for criticism in this world. Many peoples jobs depend on it..........such as Oprah's. As the head of her empire, she could not go 21 days without giving, "constructive criticism."

I believe what this pastor is trying to achieve is to get people to be more aware of the words that come out of their mouth & the negative effect that they can have on people. We all know we're guilty of this. The words are no sooner out of of our mouth, than we wish we hadn't of said them when we see the effect they had on the other person. And many times it's not just the words, but our tone of voice or the look on our face when we say them.

The pastor is just trying to say, think before you speak......don't speak harshly, judgmental, cruelly, nagging, condemning, mean, etc., etc,. etc.. Don't say those things you know you shouldn't. Don't tear people down for your own gratification, or to make yourself look better, or cause you haven't learned to deal with those same issues in your own life, or cause you're angry or impatient. As my mother always said, "Be nice!"

NOW, I DO understand where there are cases that anger or not so pleasant words may be the more appropriate case of action, such as in response to the boys you mentioned in another thread that were stomping on puppies heads.

If I played this game, it would be in an effort of self discipline, simply to teach myself to think before I spoke. If anything other than "nice" came out of my mouth, I would change the band to to the other wrist. I lead a reasonably calm life, so I will assume no puppy head stomping instances would transpire during my 21 day trial. Make that a several mo. trial, as I have not yet learned to keep my mouth shut when I know I should! As evidenced by me ending up replying to your challenge after all.

"Since I'm not as eloquent a speaker as you git, I will refrain from any attempt to try & discuss this subject, as I'm sure I would come out on the short end!"

Yup! I see that short end heading my way!



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Perhaps he should have used the word "slander" (although we generally think of slander as something even more malicious).

As my mom used to quote Thumper from Bambi - "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all"

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Is that where that came from?!

My mother said that too!

And I've heard it repeated to other kids also from their mom's.

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Maybe the pastor was going for the idea of being overly critical. Emotions and feelings are fine as long as they are reasonable(as in not harmful to you or others).

Being overly critical can add stress that doesn't need to be there, just like being too quick to anger or anxiety.

I think the idea is moderation. All the things we feel serve a purpose but there can be too much of a good thing. Like worrying over things that don't matter or can't be controlled or being so angry that you lash out inappropriately.

I'll do graffiti,
If you sing to me in French.

Ok, I looked it up on the net to see exactly what it was he said. I found several sites & they all said basically the same thing. This is an excerpt from one site:

"The challenge was to go 21 days straight without mumbling a complaining word and no gossiping and criticizing either. If a person slipped, the bracelet was to be switched to the other wrist, and the 21-day time period started over."

http://www.redorbit.com/news/technology/747754/its_all_on_the_wrist_unique_reminder_ends_personal_complaining/index.html?source=r_technology

This thing is not only spreading over the states but to other parts of the world.

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Tomorrow is April 1st. I decided to to try the 21 day trial upon wakening. My bracelet isn't purple, but it'll do. 21 days straight without mumbling a complaining word and no gossiping and criticizing either.

I also included that nothing but positive will come out of my mouth and my writing.
No negative noises such as growling, etc. etc..
No raising of my voice in anger or impatience. Though I am allowed to correct the dogs as long as there is no condemming or name calling.
No cursing or substitute words for it.
No giving of dirty looks on purpose.
No sarcasm that is delivered in a mean, angry or impatient way. However sarcasm for the sake of humor or having fun with others that appreciate it is allowed.
If I missed any, I'm sure I will discover them on the way.

Ha! I'm starting on April Fool's Day! Some people would consider that quite appropriate for such an endevor. So for the next 21 days (or whenever) (till I succeed or give up) there will be nothing but sickining sweet positive patty to put up with. Or am I that already?

Good luck!

Especially if someone pulls a prank on you!

(we had a very elaborate one set up to be discovered after midnight)

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Good luck with it, but you watch slimy individuals try to take advantage of your newfound peaceful character. After the 21 days is up you can kick butt and take names

For that period you can wear a nice black band with a skull on it. MUhahahaha.

I have no faith in humanity. Its because of the humans

Something about leopards and spots.

Well, I blew it after only a couple hrs. of carefully watching my mouth. A pastor was on TV. with a low, gravely, mumbling voice. We have both commented on this pastor before. As I turned the channel hubby made some comment, to which I rapidly replied, "Yeah, It wouldn't be so bad if he had an interpreter." I was serious & hubby laughed, but we both agreed that was critical.

So I do understand that there is a place in this world for criticism. If no one complains about this guys manner of speech, how is he to know to try & make it more understandable? But to get into the deeper aspects of this subject is not my goal. I will simply return to the rules that are laid down for me & try to abide by them, resetting my 21 day clock all over again. I AM learning to think before I speak, even in this short period of time!

Thank you both for your wishes of good luck. Superlion, would you care to share that prank with us?

"watch slimy individuals try to take advantage of your newfound peaceful character"

I've been trying to develop it for some time, so I'm beginning to wonder if anyone will even notice my new attempt at, "controlled behavior."

"After the 21 days is up you can kick butt and take names"

I never really did it before, so I don't believe I"ll do it afterward.

"I have no faith in humanity. Its because of the humans"

I do have faith in humanity, it's because of God.

"Something about leopards and spots."

something about faith and belief.

Git, you seem to have a good sense of humor. I do appreciate that.

*fish patty changing bracelet over to other wrist again, just to be on the safe side.*




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In class I learned that being critical is a natural part of human behavior. Yes, one can develope new habits such as "I will not openly make fun of people" or "I will not tell people that I don't like them" but we can't stop the innate way that we think. One will never be able to never think "Wow, those ugly shoes arn't ugly" but we can certainly not say aloud "those shoes are ugly."

Human beings constantly judge others by appearence and other basic traits. This quality is how we operate, and it cannot be helped. Certainly, we all realise that our first impressions should not be our only source for judgement, but initially upon contact of a new individual we judge them.

I'm not saying that habits can't be changed. I'm just saying that in order to change, we must realise that it is near impossible to change our thought patterns, and rather we should change the way we react to them.

Bleh. Hope that wasn't confusing... I have a tendency to ramble on a bit

Inky

Very well said Inkling! In fact, today after I messed up for the second time, I realized that I need to change my thinking as quickly as possible. Out of my thoughts come my words. So when someone says something that I don't like or agree with, I need to immediately put a positive spin on it, so something positive will come out of my mouth.

I thought this thing would be relatively easy..........but I'm amazed at all the things I say without thinking about it. That's normal, but if a negative thought is behind it all, then negative words tend to come out. I'm glad I'm messing up early, as I'm learning by it.
I can't control the first thought, but I can try & control the ones after it, thereby helping to control my speech.

I hope this all made sense too............

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I didn't think it's about be critical I think it more about be accepting people for who they are. Not saying that you have to like them just except who or what they are. Agree to Disagree, don't prejudge someone who looks different or has a different opinion. We are all critical, its hard wire in us a humans. Even that pastor is critical just by his belief if you don't beleave in god, no matter how good of a person you are you will not go to heaven. (unless you belong to his church and give the church money)

I like to say don't dislike people for what they look like, get to know them, there are many more better reasons to dislike them.

Djrichie
"Don't Panic"

I have corrected my typ-o thank you fish-patty it does change the point abit.

Djrichie
"So Long, and Thanks For All The Fish" Douglas Adams

You have some interesting opinions there dj. I'm very tempted to respond, but I will have to refrain for now, cause if I keep being careful, I will have made it to 24 hrs. by 2:40 pm. today. Apparently the first 24. hrs. has a lot of learning lessons in it.

But I do appreciate peoples opinions on this subject. Reading their responses gives an inside look into their personalities.

I do agree with the statements below though:

" I didn't think it's about be critical I think it more about be accepting people for who they are. Not saying that you have to like them just except who or what they are. Agree to Disagree, do (don't) prejudge someone who looks different or has a different opinion. We are all critical, its hard wire in us a humans."

I inserted the (don't) as I assume it was a misprint? I'm not criticizing your writing here, I just don't want anyone to misinterpret your statement.

*fish patty changes bracelet to other wrist, as she let the faintest 'word" escape from her mouth in an attempt to try & get this post just right.*

"I also included that nothing but positive will come out of my mouth and my writing."

NOTE- Please excuse any future "non existent" or "short" replies from me in regards to this thread. I do appreciate opinions, but under the obvious circumstances, I am finding it difficult to reply without considerable frustration.

I still believe in what I'm doing, though my high standards make it somewhat impractical to communicate effectively. I'll be glad when this is over & I can talk normally again. Meantime, just the trying of it has done a lot of good so far! At least I didn't take a vow of silence! Come to think of it, that might be easier.


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As much as I can appreciate what this pastor is doing, seems like there's a lot more productive things a pastor could ask his congregation to commit to. Reading in the Bible every day, for example. Which might help the parishioners distinguish helpful rebukes from gossip, slander, and "unclean talk".

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"As much as I can appreciate what this pastor is doing, seems like there's a lot more productive things a pastor could ask his congregation to commit to. Reading in the Bible every day, for example. Which might help the parishioners distinguish helpful rebukes from gossip, slander, and "unclean talk"."

I think its very productive actually. Thinking before we speak prevents a lot of miscommunication and angry exchanges that generally slow us down in life. Besides it only takes a few moments to decide whether or not your about to say something critical, rude, jusgemental, etc.

Additionally reading the Bible is a nice thought but there are those out there who don't believe in it who would benefit from thinking before speaking. Obviously the idea of the bracelet got its start in a church, but there are many non-Christians who might apply it in their lives.

I'll do graffiti,
If you sing to me in French.